swimsuit search

Dave and I decided to make a mini-vacation out of my half marathon next month, which will be taking place in Southern California. In addition to hitting up the San Diego Zoo, we also plan to spend a fair amount of time on the beach. Which means I’m now on the hunt for a swimsuit. And not just any swimsuit. No, if I’m going to wear a swimsuit in public, it has to a) cover my love handles without being frumpy, b) have adequate coverage on the bottom half without involving a skirt, and c) make me look like I have boobs without being too padded. Searching for the perfect swimsuit feels akin to hunting for Bigfoot, only I suspect Sasquatch stopping by my tent for a cuppa next time I’m camping is more likely than finding a suit that meets all of my expectations.

I was delighted to find that ModCloth has some great options:

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Snack Bar Beauty Two-Piece in Red

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Bathing Beauty One-Piece

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Bathing Beauty Two-Piece in Black

I’ve never tried a retro-style suit before, but I have a feeling the higher-waisted bottoms would be more flattering on a curvier girl like myself than the tiny little crotch triangles I find in most stores. I love the striped option, and even though I normally don’t wear red because it clashes with my hair, I might make an exception for something fun like a swimsuit.

HOWEVER.

Scattered among their generally awesome selection are some suits that make me wonder if one of their buyers is playing a joke on the world to see if people will actually buy this stuff. And if that’s the case I want to buy them a beer. If not, I want to pay for them to have their retinas checked.

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Because who DOESN’T want a stampede of unicorns to draw attention to their lady parts? (This one is out of stock, which simultaneously blows my mind and makes me hopeful that I’ll get to see somebody wearing it IRL.)

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Long sleeves and a collar for all of those life events that call for business casual beach attire.

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Ah yes, the chemical formula for “Do These Bottoms Give Me Pancake Ass?”

Do you have a favorite place to buy swimwear? Help a girl out or I might wind up wearing unicorns on my boobs.

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6 thoughts on “swimsuit search

  1. Megan

    bahahaha those are awesome! Have you checked out Victoria’s Secret? I think they have options for all body types, but I’m not sure!

    Reply
  2. Lonni

    !. Can’t wait to see you for the family picnic after your run!
    2. 2pc black suit looks vintage and really cute!

    Reply
  3. rio

    Hahahaha…. busting a gut over here! Unicorns is a must!! >>insert sarcasm<<
    Food recommendations for San Diego, Cafe Coyote is a Must!

    Reply

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